How To Handle Your Haters

Well, it finally happened. Not quite three months since the launch of Rosy Remedy and someone attempted to crush my dreams. It just happened to be a wolf in family clothing.

Let me explain…

I was on the phone with my mother, who was at the family BBQ for the Fourth of July. This gentleman, apparently a friend of the family, snatched her phone during our conversation and began asking about my life in California.

It was awkward as I don’t know him well. I tell him I’m living in San Francisco and that I’m working on a blog. (ie my obvious true calling and path to one day help millions of women work past their fears and limitations to become their brilliant one true selves so they may help billions more. Or at least, that’s how my dreams go.)

Before explaining what it is or the why behind it, he comes back with, “Average people don’t read blogs. You’re wasting your time.”

I’m silent, suprised.

He continues, “You’re better off doing anything else….Like ride a swing set. But don’t bother with blogging.”

The inspirational books read and podcasts I surround myself with couldn’t prepare me for the feeling of my heart swimming in the bottom of my stomach. As if it wasn’t enough for him to tell me to drop my dreams right then and there, he told me that my mission is of no value to anyone, even myself.

Mind you, this man drives a truck for a living. There is nothing wrong with that, but he is not my target audience. But in that moment, I wanted to make him some kind of target. After a deep breathe, I respond as strongly as I could muster, “Well, it feeds my soul” and not another word. He put my dad on the phone. And that was it.

What would your response be?

I can’t prepare you for the pain that will undoubtedly come if someone tells you similar. Gosh, I hope no one ever does, especially not someone in what should be a safe haven and loving environment. But when they do, my best advice is DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM.

No matter you they are, they do not understand, they cannot fathom, the divine and unique power that lives within you, that motivates you to go after your dreams. They cannot tell you what should and shouldn’t make you excited to wake up in the morning and conquer your day. No one knows you like you do. Everyone else is thinking about themselves. Don’t let them cast their shadow on your radiance. Rise above. Easier said than done, though, right?

  • Okay, how did you respond for me? Did you stand up for me from behind your screen even without realizing it? Were you angry, shaken, or supportive?
  • Again, I ask, how would you respond for yourself? Is it the same response you had when it was me?

I ask these questions because I go to the ends of the earth to defend my friends. However, when I am personally attacked, my fire dampens like I’ve been hit with a tsunami. It’s something I’m working on. Thinking about the ride-or-die attitude I have for my friends has helped me to keep my fire alive when hit at even my weakest point.

I am one more voice, giving the same advice to never give up…

But sincerely, please don’t. Don’t let someone take out their problems on you in an unhealthy way and allow yourself to fall short of your undeniable potential. Allow yourself to be wonderful.

And have friends who support your wonderful! Just in case my words are not enough, here is an [edited] message my sister sent him after this event.

“[Rick], I heard how you talked to my sister on the fourth of July. Maybe you’re okay with crushing kid’s dreams, but don’t you ever try to crush my sister’s. She’s doing what she loves and exploring life.”

Still not enough? Watch this 3 minute Casey Neistat film and feel the power.

It may inspire you to push for your dreams even harder so you can someday make a video like this. Or something like that.

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Mary Caitlin
Mary Caitlin

Lifestyle blogger and creator at Rosy Remedy, exploring the connection between intention, authenticity and happiness. On the hunt for small moments, big water, everything vintage and the best dry cappuccino in the Galaxy.

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